We Spend A Lot Of Money On A Child, And He Doesn't Appreciate It. How To Be?

We Spend A Lot Of Money On A Child, And He Doesn't Appreciate It. How To Be?
We Spend A Lot Of Money On A Child, And He Doesn't Appreciate It. How To Be?

Video: We Spend A Lot Of Money On A Child, And He Doesn't Appreciate It. How To Be?

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Video: How to raise successful kids -- without over-parenting | Julie Lythcott-Haims 2023, February

Late at work? How not to buy a new toy for a child, because he is so looking forward to a meeting. Did you answer well in the lesson? It is necessary to show that he is well done, again a gift! As a result, the shelves are already bursting with things, and the child keeps demanding and demanding new purchases. We figure out how to explain to the child where the money comes from, and at the same time not spoil the relationship with him.


Why do children constantly ask to buy something?

Surely you tried to explain that making money is difficult, you need to spend it wisely, and even yelled at children, but nothing helps - they still continue to beg for new things.

Psychologists explain this not at all by greed and not by the desire to ruin the parents. Simply, this is how the world of children works! For example, Mary Wallace, a family psychotherapist from the USA, in her book on parenting, Birth Order Blues, says that in the child's world, as after the victory of socialism, there is an abundance of everything. And you just have to ask, pama and mom will figure it out. That is, receiving gifts for children is absolutely normal, moreover, if you constantly remind how difficult it is to give money, that the toy must be "earned", the child may think that he is not loved for no reason, and will demand confirmation of love - that is, even more shopping.

But there are still ways to explain the value of money to a child without affecting the relationship.

So, what are these ways? Send to work?

No, it’s better to let the child try to manage the money on their own instead. For example, give him a fixed amount per week. Yes, most likely, he will spend everything on the first day on soda and chips (admit, you yourself would have done that at his age!), But next time he will be smarter. Even World Bank research confirms that the sooner a child gets at his disposal, albeit small, but his own money, the less likely he is to go into debt as an adult.

Of course, parents would like to know what the child spent his money on. There are convenient tools for this, for example, the family mobile bank "Svoi Krug" from the Japanese SBI Bank. Svoy Krug is an adult and children's mobile application. Through an adult application, parents can transfer pocket money to a child, see what he spends it on, set limits. And the child can be given tasks and assigned a reward for them.

And after that, the child will immediately understand where the money comes from?

Of course not. Although, studies show, children understand that money can be earned through work and then spent on something pleasant, quite early, at about the age of 7 to 10 years. But let's not forget about psychology. After all, it is important for children to understand that they are safe, and their parents love them. Shopping is part of this safe world. So do not expect that the child will automatically realize the whole burden of responsibility, having received 100 rubles for a week.

But explaining to him how best to spend money and how you can earn it is easier with the children's application "My Circle START". In it, the child has his own account, a piggy bank, he can complete tasks and receive a reward. It works like this: parents, through an adult application, send their child a request, for example, to take a walk with their sister or to clean the room. The child can accept or reject the assignment. This is how he understands the value of his work. If the child completes the task and shares the result in his application, the money for the work done automatically goes to him in a virtual piggy bank. Here, by the way, pocket money is kept that the child has not yet spent. So he will immediately see how much he managed to earn, how much he saved. Everything is like in the adult world!

And how much pocket money should be given to children, for example, a month?

According to the results of a survey on social networks, the majority of our readers give children an average of 100 to 300 rubles per week. But this does not mean that you should spend the same amount, because the level of income is different for everyone, moreover, the main thing is not the amount of money, but the trust that you give to the child.

With the children's mobile bank "Svoy Krug", the child understands that he is trusted and learns responsibility. The application helps him understand how to spend money better and earn faster in order to save up for what he has long dreamed of. When there is enough money in the piggy bank, the child himself can “break” it and spend it at his own discretion. For the child, this is responsibility for the decisions he makes, and for the parents, it is an opportunity to show that you completely trust his choice. Of course, parents will still receive a notification that the piggy bank is "broken", but this is just a matter of safety.

Benefits are good. But what if the child immediately withdraws money from the card and I don’t know what he spent? Or will he meet scammers?

In "Own circle" you can set a cash withdrawal limit. And in order to protect the child from fraudsters, the Japanese SBI Bank came up with a special payment keychain instead of the usual children's card. It is no coincidence that Japan is known for its love of technology!

The keychain can be used as a public transport pass and even as a school pass for children (imagine the faces of your classmates!). You are not afraid to lose the keychain - the bank will restore it in just a few working days. In addition, the key fob, unlike a regular card, is equipped with a protection system against fraudsters, and it can only be paid on the Internet on certain sites that are safe for children. Good news for fidget parents - the keychain is made of durable materials, rarely breaks and is not afraid of water.

But what about gratitude? After all, the child did not earn this money - do you think he will be able to realize how much and how hard we work?

A child can repeat the endless "buy, buy, buy" because he hears how much the money issue worries the parents. If parents constantly quarrel over money, use money to achieve the desired behavior, and they themselves are prone to impulsive purchases and cannot plan a budget, then they will not show children an example of an adequate attitude to finances.

Therefore, first of all, you need to try to form healthy financial habits yourself, then children will become more serious about money. Here's a quick checklist to help you reduce unnecessary waste:

Don't feel guilty about it. Yes, this does not sound like financial advice, but after all, parents often think: "I did not have such a toy in my childhood, can I not afford to buy it for a child?" There are many ways to spend time with your child without unnecessary shopping.

Understand that saving is okay. If you do not have the money now to go to a new cartoon in the cinema, you can directly say about it and watch another cartoon at home, the child will still be happy with the time spent with you.

Find "cash vacuum cleaners". It can be both loans and small things - for example, cellular communications. It may seem that 1000 rubles for communication per month is not enough, but in terms of a year, the amount is already impressive. Review the terms of the loan, connect cashback, change the operator. The family budget is made up of such trifles.

Save up correctly. You need to clearly understand what you are saving for - an apartment, vacation or pension. Imagine moving to a new home or walking along the beach, so there will be less temptations to break loose and spend savings. Better yet, automate your savings. For example, in "Own circle" you can automatically send part of the money to the savings account.

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