I Know How To Help A Teenager Choose The Right Profession: The Story Of A Mother Of Four Children

Health 2023
I Know How To Help A Teenager Choose The Right Profession: The Story Of A Mother Of Four Children
I Know How To Help A Teenager Choose The Right Profession: The Story Of A Mother Of Four Children

Video: I Know How To Help A Teenager Choose The Right Profession: The Story Of A Mother Of Four Children

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Video: Career Paths 2023, January
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Let's listen to a mother with many children, whose three children will graduate from school next year. It is very rare when a child from an early age knows exactly who he wants to become in the future. More often, children need help in choosing a profession - both from parents and vocational guidance specialists. Anna Semerikova, General Director of the Opening Horizons charity foundation for the younger generation, supported by KFC, and a mother of four, told Letidor about her experience. Parents with many children know very well: even in the same family, children are not alike. They have different tastes, hobbies, positions in relation to any issues. And they may also need different help in choosing a profession. I'll tell you with my example. I have four children (two of them are adopted), and three are now adolescents, studying in the 11th grade, which means they are at the age when you need to decide what to do after school. Desires - a child, not yours With one of my daughters, we started talking about a future profession three years ago. At first there were just discussions, but, as often happens, it was difficult for her to make an informed choice. In order to stir up interest in this topic, together we started attending consultations of career counseling specialists and taking tests. I also helped her sign up for a career guidance course, after which she realized that she wanted to be a project manager. This is a very broad area - projects can be managed at various levels, from your own family to the state. Then she decided that she did not want to study at the full-time department of the university - she would rather choose the correspondence course and combine it with work. This desire did not coincide with mine - I really wanted her to receive a classical full-time education at a good university. But, having heard her clear position and arguments, I agreed with her opinion and since then I consider myself not entitled to interfere and press. Already today, she successfully combines work with studies at school, I hope this will continue to be so, after entering the university. Technique 15 minutes My second daughter, an adopted child who has not been in our family for so long, does not know at all who she wants to be and what to do. Moreover, she gets lost even with the answer to the question about her interests. “I don’t want to choose who to be,” she said recently. Here it is important for parents to understand that for "I do not want" actually stands for "I am afraid." The child transmits the fear of making a choice, the fear of going into adulthood and making independent decisions. What should parents do? Arm yourself with patience and slowly, step by step, go through the entire path of choosing a profession with your child - literally by the handle, so that he feels your support. The “15 minutes technique” helped me a lot: every day, for 15 minutes, talk with your child on topics that are of interest to him. But, attention, not about grades or "adult future"! Most likely, you will be discussing TV shows, music, friends, but gradually you will have a very close bond with your child - and then you can approach the discussion of more serious issues. By the way, children hear everything, even if it seems to you that they are buried in the phone and do not respond. The most important thing in talking about the future, as in many other issues, is not to press and not talk to the child from a position of strength - you will see the results of your labors only over time. With my daughter, we are slowly discussing what exams to take, what areas she might be interested in.It is important to remember that if you have never talked to your child about such serious and complex topics as choosing a profession, it is better to start gradually. For example, I noticed that she really likes to paint, and offered to go to a make-up master class (not to mention that it would be a "test for the profession"). We attended the lesson together, discussed it and realized that she does not see herself in the profession of a make-up artist. We went to a lecture on psychology, which is also interesting to her, and made a similar conclusion. Now, after consulting with a career guidance specialist and numerous conversations, we are actively looking towards sociology or HR. I want to introduce her to my colleagues, who could tell what tasks HR specialists have, how they solve them, so that my daughter understands whether she is attracted to it or not. But the following is important here. Despite the fact that my interference in the process of self-determination is deep enough, my daughter must sooner or later make her choice of profession on her own. Right to make mistakes My third child, my son, also does not yet understand what he wants - but he asked not to interfere in his choice. And as much as I want to help him, I respect his request. At the same time, I am always ready to discuss this or that issue with him, if he needs it. It is difficult for me to stand aside when I see how he makes some mistakes - for example, when choosing subjects for passing the exam. But I understand that I need to give him room to make these mistakes. My husband and I also did not immediately find our calling, it took us many years and useless exams to understand that we were in our place and were doing work that inspires us. Therefore, in our family, mistakes are normal and they are considered part of life. The son has not yet decided whether he will go on to study after school or start working. He is interested in entrepreneurship, so maybe he will start his own business. And we accept his choice. 3 common questions about choosing a profession for a child At what age to start talking with a child about the future? The sooner the better. I recommend starting light career guidance for children even at the age of 4-5. With my youngest son, a five-year-old kid, we already go to the parks of professions - they are interesting for children and encourage them to talk about the profession. We also had time to try different circles, such as, for example, sports, drawing, but he was interested in robotics, which means that he should be given the opportunity to develop this interest in the corresponding circle. At the same time, I perfectly understand that this area does not necessarily become his future profession. What if the child is afraid to choose a profession and make a mistake? Let him know - and realize for yourself - that choosing a place to study, choosing a profession, and choosing a future are not the same thing. A person can learn to be a geologist, work as a programmer and find himself by becoming a fitness trainer. All kinds of life paths do not exist. For example, the founder of KFC, Colonel Sanders, changed several dozen professions before entering the restaurant business at the age of 40, and real success came to him only after 60 years. I try to orient children not to specific professions, but to areas related to their interests: science or humanities, management or communication with people. Ideally, they will go to university for a specialty that will give them competencies that are useful in different positions. In addition, I try to orient children towards practical acquaintance with the profession long before entering the university. There are many methods: internships, internships, open days, meeting colleagues and friends who can talk about their work. The choice of a profession is especially difficult for difficult teenagers and boarding school pupils. How can I help them? I have a wealth of experience in this matter, since the Opening Horizons Foundation implements the Generation Choice program just for such adolescents.We invite specialists of various positions, volunteers, who honestly and impartially tell children about their professional experience. Skeptics think that teenagers from boarding schools and difficult families can no longer be helped, their future is predetermined: at best, they will graduate from one of the three colleges available to them. But in fact, our program teaches adolescents to make their own choices - so that they are ready to make it when the opportunity arises. I would advise all parents, even those who have already decided that a son or daughter “will follow in their professional footsteps,” to teach their child to choose or give him the tools for future choices. Photo: Depositphotos Let's be friends on social networks! Subscribe to us on Facebook, VKontakte and Odnoklassniki!

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