The upbringing of children in our country is taken over by mothers. And fathers do it better. This is how the writer Dmitry Yemets, the father of seven children, does it.
Practice shows that most often young children behave capriciously and destructively in several cases.
Tired and hungry
Children are acutely hungry. Their blood sugar immediately drops, and they start to freak out. Whenever you go for a long walk, take with you chocolates, candy, juice with straws, etc.
Most children who puddle and squeal do so out of fatigue and hunger, while some parents think they are feeding them an appetite for a walk.
Appetite, of course, can be worked up, but only on the site in front of the house, and a long walk - even 3-4 km - can exhaust the child, and he will start to arrange concerts. This is where a chocolate bar can help. Well, or you can take sandwiches with cheese, a thermos with sweet tea and other right things. You will be surprised, but with the right feeding, the child drives away any parent. Children just do not like to walk in a boring and linear way. They run, then look at something, and the parent loses patience.
Another very good option is a scooter. A child on a scooter moves very quickly, easily and with pleasure. True, in Moscow conditions it is rather a history for the park.
Children are very capricious when they have nothing to do, and they do not know how to occupy themselves. The phrase "go do something" is usually only annoying. It means that you are not needed, tired, bored and generally scramble out of here. And adults, by the way, are also very annoyed by such advice. Tell your wife, husband, or mother-in-law, “Go do something useful,” and see how positively they take your advice.
Many mothers are very fond of diagnosing children with hyperactivity. In fact, there is such a diagnosis, but it is much more likely that you just have a healthy, joyful, full of vitality child who does not know what to do with himself. And now all these forces are torn from him, he breaks everything, drops, fights, interferes with his parents. The main reason is still underload. Take the child to a section where he will be physically stressed, and at home help him find a business that interests him. Not all children, especially boys, can do it themselves right away. We had one acquaintance mother who got up very early in order to have time to run out her very active sons in the forest. And then they were quite normal all day and did not carry anything at school.
Now a very good sport is coming into fashion rapidly - triathlon. This is swimming, running, cycling. Very serious workload.
Children are little vampires. They need attention, attention, attention. A lot of attention. In any case, until the moment when they find in this world what fascinates them. And it’s better if it’s something creative, not online games. Gamblers most often become from loneliness, longing and inability to communicate with peers. In those families where parents are wrapped up, tired or pay little attention to children. The person is in pain, he cannot cope and begins to look for pleasures drowning his anxiety, of which the computer is mistakenly considered the safest. Relatively speaking, if a child falls into a bad company or uses drugs, parents in most cases will start ringing bells and do something. And here he plays and plays. Like sitting at home, not staggering behind garages. And the parent ceases to perceive it as a danger. And only then he grabs his head.
I am sure that in the next ten years, when more medical statistics appear, computer games will be banned or severely restricted, as they are now trying to restrict smoking and alcohol. The situation will be the same as with morphine, which in the 19th century was sold in pharmacies as a hypnotic sedative. Or as with tobacco, which doctors advised children to smoke as a cure for tuberculosis. And then some statistics appeared, and now no one believes that this was possible. Be very careful with the games, and now, while the child is still listening to you. It is almost impossible to take a computer away from a 16-year-old child. But not buying him a smartphone at the age of 7, which will most likely lead to games later, is much more realistic. Better buy an aquarium, hamsters, constructors - whatever. And you will see how difficult it is for poor hamsters and fish to compete with a smartphone, what kind of battles you have to endure. But also get ready for the fact that there will be a lot of whining, because the release from smartphone addiction in a small child proceeds like a classic such withdrawal. And I also write in almost every article at least once: download audiobooks to a USB flash drive and put them in the car when you are driving somewhere yourself or with a child. You will see positive changes very quickly. If you do not know where to download these audiobooks, type in "radio performances from old records" in a search engine or find my VK page.
The main advantage of audiobooks is that you cannot read aloud to a child and keep him busy for 20 hours a day. And audiobooks can. Soon enough, they will supplant even cartoons. But the skill of listening is not immediately developed. At first, some children will not be able to concentrate for a long time. It should be done gradually. Or before going to bed, when the child is already in bed, but still refuses to sleep. Or in the car - this is just that good option for gradual addiction. And then there will be players, headphones, etc.
Dmitry Emets is a philologist and writer, author of over 30 books. The main book series: "Tanya Grotter", "Methodius Buslaev", "School of Divers". The books "The Rebellion of Babies", "The Day of Babies", "The Mysterious Someone Out There" are devoted to the problems of parenting and large families. Married, father of seven children.